W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> Moi, Toi, et VoI: December 2008

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Lyme Lifesaver.

Poor little Ernie has been so sick the past few days. It started with what appeared to be a sore foot, but within two weeks he became a completely lethargic little dog hobbling around stiffly, howling because he couldn't get down the stairs. We had to carry him to his food dish he hurt so badly. So sad! Poor little guy! I was convinced it was Lyme disease, not because I am a hypocondriac Munchausen by proxy type or anything, but all the evidence appeared to be there: arthitic joints, swollen glands, lethargy, exposed to ticks in Bucks county two months ago during which time his Frontline had been washed out by a bath....even SFG agreed it seemed a likely diagnosis. However, thank god I was wrong, even though the vet didn't know what exactly was wrong with him. Some sort of nasty bug that needed to run its course. She gave him some powerful anti-inflammatory drug and now he's running around with his squeaky chicken leg and chasing Molly into the closet again. Phew!

Happy New Year y'all if I don't write/speak/email/SMS/MMS/fax before then!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008


Saturday, December 20, 2008

She's Losing It.

Oy oy oy. Not even the quarter box of wine I have consumed can ameliorate the sick feeling I have right now. Yesterday's and today's numbers at The Canary were horrible. HORRIBLE (that was in French.)! What I have been making in a weekend I used to make on Saturday alone. The only comforting fact is knowing that everyone is in the shitter, which really only makes me feel some reassurance that it's not me, it's the whole damn economy that is totally and completely fucked. FUCKED!

Last year we had 15+ orders for buche de noels. This year two. TWO! BARF. Last year we had a wall full of corporate holiday orders. This year a small sprinking. AND IT'S FREAKIN' ME OUT BIG TIME.

And on top of that, Mr. X sent me a totally unexpected text saying he'd heard Fairytale of New York and was thinking of me. What creepily fantastic timing!

In any event, once '09 hits, I plan on hiring a PR person to work some magic for The Canary. The Wharton people did some research on my biggest competitor and that is what worked for them, so why not. I've gotta try something. It's just so damn frustrating because I know I've got a good product, and I've just got to let it be known. My cupcakes are damn good, people. I swear. Don't ask me. Ask The Biggest Food Critic in Philadelphia, who just gave The Canary a shout out (and wrote about us in his 2007 book fyi). And they love us on Yelp!

(I apologize for the fiesty rant. I am just really stressed out. Like seriously frustrated and stressed here. This is the year I'm finally supposed to be able to see some light at the end of the tunnel, but no no no, t'was not meant to be. George W. Bush decided to wage his inner Freudian psychodrama on the world stage and look where we are today.)

And now I swear I am starting to get sick. I just sneezed three times in a row.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

It's the Economy, Stupid.

I wish I could say that I haven't been blogging because I've been so incredibly busy that all I can concentrate on doing when I come home is The Hills and shiraz, but no. Not even close. The Circus is as dead as a freakin' door nail, other than the El Cheapo Produce Joint which seems not to be phased by the shite economic state of this great country, but whatever. Argh!

The one shining moment in Hell was that yesterday an old man came up to the counter to tell me I was 'absolutely gorgeous'. Clearly the quality of his eyesight needs to be called into question, but I'll take it. So I gave him a free cupcake. Pathetic, eh?

I confess I've been spending time watching a lot of the Judge shows when I come home from work at 2 (2!). But I don't drink wine until at least 6. That's four hours to bite my nails and pray that people will stop making box cupcake mix and just buy 'em already. Who has time to bake?!

I heard on the BBC the other night that the itinerant Mexican workers are leaving the U.S. to go back to Mexico because there's no work.

The one saving grace is that we got a very nice cushy order for a Tiffany's themed sorority party in January (blue-green cupcakes with white bow). Will bite nails until then.


Sunday, December 07, 2008

Cheerleaders' Convention in Town.

There is little more disturbing than a seven year old girl with blue eye shadow and red lipstick sucking on a rock candy lollipop watching you frost cupcakes through the sneezeguard.

Friday, December 05, 2008

Dear Santa.

Please Father Christmas, all I want this year is Laguna Beach and The Hills on dvd. I promise I'll work really hard to be good. Thank you in advance.

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Man vs. Dog.

Monday, December 01, 2008

The Holiday Season Has Officially Begun.

This morning on my way to buy holiday trimmings for the shop, I saw the body of a man who had just jumped from the roof of the Loews Hotel on the sidewalk.