My Aunt Died. But Not Really.
My Aunt Daisy Ann had a sort of OBE.
She was flipping through the obits, as most Catholics and people with some mileage on them often do, and there she was: "Daisy Ann Ortiz*, 73, of Milwaukee died of natural causes Saturday, etc. etc..."
Needless to say it pretty much freaked the crap out of her.
She went for a massage and the massage therapist brought the clipping to her attention all the while laughing laughing and laughing. At 73, the poor woman didn't laugh back. My mom laughed when she told her the story. She's twelve years younger than Auntie.
Then people started calling her. Which is really odd considering that a) they assume she's dead and can't come to the phone right now and b) she lives alone anyway, so unless my cousins were already cleaning out the jewelry stash tucked in the back of the kitchen cabinet, there'd be nobody to come to the phone right now.
How very very weird to see your name in print like that. Same age, same city. Especially when you've already crossed the Mason-Dixon Side of Life and you're seeing the signs for Boca...
My search for the actual obit was in vain. But I did find this very handy dandy Obit Messenger that will update you on fresh death via your Blackberry. This is an especially good tool for New Yorkers looking for a new rental!
*This is a very close approximation of her actual name and that amuses me.
She was flipping through the obits, as most Catholics and people with some mileage on them often do, and there she was: "Daisy Ann Ortiz*, 73, of Milwaukee died of natural causes Saturday, etc. etc..."
Needless to say it pretty much freaked the crap out of her.
She went for a massage and the massage therapist brought the clipping to her attention all the while laughing laughing and laughing. At 73, the poor woman didn't laugh back. My mom laughed when she told her the story. She's twelve years younger than Auntie.
Then people started calling her. Which is really odd considering that a) they assume she's dead and can't come to the phone right now and b) she lives alone anyway, so unless my cousins were already cleaning out the jewelry stash tucked in the back of the kitchen cabinet, there'd be nobody to come to the phone right now.
How very very weird to see your name in print like that. Same age, same city. Especially when you've already crossed the Mason-Dixon Side of Life and you're seeing the signs for Boca...
My search for the actual obit was in vain. But I did find this very handy dandy Obit Messenger that will update you on fresh death via your Blackberry. This is an especially good tool for New Yorkers looking for a new rental!
*This is a very close approximation of her actual name and that amuses me.
posted by Oy Vey at 1:48 PM
1 Comments:
That's crazy! Do you know, there's another Guinness Girl out there? (Ok, not really Guinness Girl, but my real name)? She lives in Michigan. Kook-o-rama. I hope she hasn't died.
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