RotD: My Illogical Hatred of Milk.
Beets and Milk.
I'm not going to even get into beets. Beets taste like dirt. And dirt doesn't taste good. Eating dirt is a symptom of pica, a psychological disorder. So, if you eat beets then you must have pica.
Milk. Oh how you make me shiver. A glass of milk is about the most disgusting thing there is. I'm not totally anti-milk. Just drinking it. I don't know what it is, because I use milk all the time in cakes. I drink about six lattes a day. And if I want some cereal, I use it as a condiment, where I just wet the cereal to the point where it won't scratch my throat when I swallow. Or if I have a chocolate chip cookie, I will dip the cookie in a bowl of milk. But I'd never, ever actually take a sip from a glass.
And don't even get me started on The Glass of Milk with Ice. I know! It's completely nonsensical. But there's something about mixing the milk with water that gives me the heebeejeebees.
But the most insane thing is that I love all other forms of dairy. I'm a cheese whore and will eat almost any kind of cheese you set in front of me. Yogurt rocks. And I love sour cream. Who doesn't love bacteria-riddled heated cream? And clotted cream is the freaking Food of the Gods.
I honestly don't know where this started. Had to be in my early childhood because I've always felt this way about milk. I was forced to drink it. I used to hold my nose and chug that fucker down as fast as humanly possible otherwise I wasn't allowed to leave the table. It wasn't like I could spit it into my napkin like the peas I was also forced to consume and feed them to the dog under the table. The logistics of such a maneuver were beyond my six-year old capabilities.
Borscht. Are you KIDDING ME?