W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> Moi, Toi, et VoI: Hands Off!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Hands Off!

I have this unidentified lump on my right palm. It hurts when pressed, which has made using tools difficult. I've been doing a lot of painting at Deuce and I've had to hold the brush like a pen and lemme tell you, that seriously hurts after 450 square feet of that kind of maneuvering.

My doctor thinks it is either a ripped tendon sheath or a cyst on the tendon. I have an appointment with a hand surgeon next week to take a look at it.

Oh, just thinking about the phrases "my hand" and "surgeon" make me woozy to think about. I do not like my hands or feet poked, prodded, pulled or otherwise fondled in any way. I scream like a banshee when my mom puts acupuncture needles in my hands. And those needles are nothing like the needles that they show on WebMD for aspirating palmar cysts.

I can't even think about this without my eyes crossing. I will sign any forms waiving claims against Jefferson for general anesthesia. They will at the very least have to give me a Valium drip and lay me down flat because I will not last long with a 172 gauge needle in the palm of my dominant hand. I can't even think about the possibility of the knife.

I think I am going to faint.

3 Comments:

Blogger Monkey said...

I hope it is a cyst! Keeping my fingers crossed that you will not need surgery. Keep us posted. Sending positive vibes your way.

7/23/2009 11:07 PM  
Blogger Christine said...

Oh no! Fingers crossed here too. I have my surgical consult for my eyelid in August. We could make it a double date! I'd be right next door at Wills. I've been trying to ignore the fact that any surgery I would have, I would likely be awake, and holy freak out batman. AWAKE. Surgery on my eyelid. *deep breathes*

(Also, whoa am I so not helpful. Heartcha!)

7/24/2009 7:38 AM  
Blogger Oy Vey said...

Thanks, Monkey! I'm feelin' the vibes!

Christine, yes, I like this double date idea. I can't imagine what surgery on your eyelid is like when you must see what's happening, right? OMGOMG. Sharp things so near...Ohhhh that is frightening. But you'll get to wear an eyepatch when it's done, right? That's a plus.

7/24/2009 7:47 AM  

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