I'm Not Expecting to Grow Flowers in the Desert, But I Can Look and Breathe and See the Sun in Wintertime.
I have succombed. After 11 years with TMobile (I have the world's oldest SimCard, for the record- my original Omnipoint Simcard from 1998!) I have done The Deed and Switched. To AT&T and the wonderful oh-how-I-can't-wait-to-have-it-in-my-clicky-painful-thumbs iPhone. I spent over an hour and a half trying to 'port' my 7+ year old 917 number to the new service. I'm not convinced I got anywhere with it, but I won't know for sure until I actually activate the phone when I get it - in one to two weeks. WTF- can't they, like, wifi it to me or something? Like, put it in the replicator and transport it to me? Amazon Prime it maybe? Ok, I must wait. And I am sure I must wait for an extra few days because they will only send it to my billing address (home) and I am never home, so I will at some point in the next six months, pick it up from the UPS depot on Oregon and Front. In any event, I can't wait to relieve my thumbs of their overtime duty and be able to redeem my Groupons from my (i)Phone. How fuckin' cool is that?
Oh yeah, I won't be able to pick up my iPhone TOMORROW because of the goddamn City of Filthadelphia and their completely outrageous potholes, which have, for the third time in five years, ripped the oil pan off the chassis of the Jetta. Absolutely inexcusable. Close your libraries! Close your public pools! But fix the freaking 2 foot deep potholes that scatter Center City like the wholes in the damn budget! Goddamn! Dammit! Thank the gods for AAA, is all I can say, or someone would be getting a black eye.
Did I mention I made one of my bakers cry this morning? Please- I am a very easy going boss, a natural teacher, but if you act lazy or stupid, and you are not, in fact, either, I will be hard on you. If I get on you that means I like you.
Poor Baker, who is young, and tries hard to please, and is smart and funny and wonderful generally, has been a wee bit lazy of late. She forgot to order some essentials for this morning and basically made a pan of brownies unusable.
"Don't make me come in here on Sundays or I will be really cranky!"
So I made my banana bread cupcakes and announced my departure.
The poor thing volunteered to pay for the brownies she fucked up. Tears welling up in her eyes.
I almost welled up at the point. I also wanted to laugh - not at her - but because I wasn't as mad as the poor dear thought I was. I guess I am scary because I am the boss and I am old.
"Well, stop crying. It's not a big deal. You won't do it again, right?'
Shakes her head.
"Well, that's what's important then."
Nods.
Poor poor thing. I am such a witch.
Did I mention that the buyer of SFG's condo is having a snafu with her mortgage? UH OH. I am trying not to panic. In fact, for a change, I am being the rational one: I'm sure she just didn't get her shit in on time, no worries, just pester her for the pro rated difference with the closing date change. She is a lawyer, after all, and every lawyer I worked with was a procrastinator. Really, I'm sure it is just a hiccup.
It better be a hiccup or I will vomit.
Meanwhile, we are painting the living room at the new place...The mess is starting to get to me...
and more mess....mess....I am, by nature, not a neat freak, but geez Louise...
...Even Ernie's pissed off at this point...
Please don't call Animal Control. We'll get it cleaned up. Soooooooon. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Oh yeah, I won't be able to pick up my iPhone TOMORROW because of the goddamn City of Filthadelphia and their completely outrageous potholes, which have, for the third time in five years, ripped the oil pan off the chassis of the Jetta. Absolutely inexcusable. Close your libraries! Close your public pools! But fix the freaking 2 foot deep potholes that scatter Center City like the wholes in the damn budget! Goddamn! Dammit! Thank the gods for AAA, is all I can say, or someone would be getting a black eye.
Did I mention I made one of my bakers cry this morning? Please- I am a very easy going boss, a natural teacher, but if you act lazy or stupid, and you are not, in fact, either, I will be hard on you. If I get on you that means I like you.
Poor Baker, who is young, and tries hard to please, and is smart and funny and wonderful generally, has been a wee bit lazy of late. She forgot to order some essentials for this morning and basically made a pan of brownies unusable.
"Don't make me come in here on Sundays or I will be really cranky!"
So I made my banana bread cupcakes and announced my departure.
The poor thing volunteered to pay for the brownies she fucked up. Tears welling up in her eyes.
I almost welled up at the point. I also wanted to laugh - not at her - but because I wasn't as mad as the poor dear thought I was. I guess I am scary because I am the boss and I am old.
"Well, stop crying. It's not a big deal. You won't do it again, right?'
Shakes her head.
"Well, that's what's important then."
Nods.
Poor poor thing. I am such a witch.
Did I mention that the buyer of SFG's condo is having a snafu with her mortgage? UH OH. I am trying not to panic. In fact, for a change, I am being the rational one: I'm sure she just didn't get her shit in on time, no worries, just pester her for the pro rated difference with the closing date change. She is a lawyer, after all, and every lawyer I worked with was a procrastinator. Really, I'm sure it is just a hiccup.
It better be a hiccup or I will vomit.
Meanwhile, we are painting the living room at the new place...The mess is starting to get to me...
and more mess....mess....I am, by nature, not a neat freak, but geez Louise...
...Even Ernie's pissed off at this point...
Please don't call Animal Control. We'll get it cleaned up. Soooooooon. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
posted by Oy Vey at 8:55 PM
2 Comments:
Forget animal control...I'm calling Hoarders. :)
i'm surprised you could even find ernie in that mess.
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