Apocalypse Watch: My Friend Has Gone Bananas
I decided to call an old friend from high school whom I speak to every four to six months or so to check in, swap gossip, whatever. I ask her how physician's assistant school is going and she tells me that, well, she's "joined the Christian ministry." Okay...strange for her, I thought, but okay. It's been a while since we've spoken...
We start to talk about what's been going on and all of the sudden she says, "We are in end times, Oy Vey. It's true. You see it every single day. This is the end of days."
Alright, all of my faithful readers know that I semi sorta half-jokingly believe that too. But I figure if we can make it to the end of 2008, we're in the clear. But wha....?
"Satan is meddling in all of our relationships these days. He's got his devil hands in everything. It seems unbelievable, I know, but it's true."
Silence.
"And these homo-sekcsuals. Again, there you go. Satan."
I honestly didn't know how to respond. She had also just told me that she never started school, quit her job, had been hospitalized for a nervous breakdown, and was waiting for the sheriff to come and kick her out of her house because she hadn't paid rent in the past 3 months. So I said, "huh."
"But I'm not worried about any of that because the Lord will take care of me. Do you go to synagogue?"
And I proceeded to step with caution, explaining that I consider myself a spiritual person, not a religious one. That we're all here for a purpose and we need to be good to one another blagh blagh...
So she decided she's going to help me out by sending me her dogeared copy of The Five People You Meet in Heaven. She had a serious chuckle when I told her I lived on Christian Street.
We're going to get together real soon. Yeah, real soon. Makes me sad. She used to be cool.
Blegch...
We start to talk about what's been going on and all of the sudden she says, "We are in end times, Oy Vey. It's true. You see it every single day. This is the end of days."
Alright, all of my faithful readers know that I semi sorta half-jokingly believe that too. But I figure if we can make it to the end of 2008, we're in the clear. But wha....?
"Satan is meddling in all of our relationships these days. He's got his devil hands in everything. It seems unbelievable, I know, but it's true."
Silence.
"And these homo-sekcsuals. Again, there you go. Satan."
I honestly didn't know how to respond. She had also just told me that she never started school, quit her job, had been hospitalized for a nervous breakdown, and was waiting for the sheriff to come and kick her out of her house because she hadn't paid rent in the past 3 months. So I said, "huh."
"But I'm not worried about any of that because the Lord will take care of me. Do you go to synagogue?"
And I proceeded to step with caution, explaining that I consider myself a spiritual person, not a religious one. That we're all here for a purpose and we need to be good to one another blagh blagh...
So she decided she's going to help me out by sending me her dogeared copy of The Five People You Meet in Heaven. She had a serious chuckle when I told her I lived on Christian Street.
We're going to get together real soon. Yeah, real soon. Makes me sad. She used to be cool.
Blegch...
posted by Oy Vey at 7:31 PM
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